Minnie-mizing the Pain

All parents know that bedtime doesn't really happen like it's portrayed on TV -- moms and dads laying down their half-asleep progeny then serenely gliding to the door for one more glance at their sleeping cherubs. No, bedtime is usually riddled with "I'm not tired" and "I don't WANT to go to bed!"

My kids take it a step further. For example, to avoid going right to sleep, my three-year-old Belle asks, "Can I talk to my sleeping friends?" It's her own virtual slumber party with her stuffed animals like Minnie Mouse.

I say "Yes, you may have a slumber party with Minnie as long as you don't wake your brother," Johnny, who's two. Some nights I've seen Belle looking out the window and waving to neighbors who pass by the house. I've asked her not to do that, so she has been getting more savvy with her questions.

She takes a deep breath and asks, "Daddy, can I talk to my sleeping friends for five minutes quietly while laying down and not looking out the window?"

"Yes," I say.

One day last summer, my wife and I put the kids to bed and then I go outside to mow the lawn. Belle looks out the window to watch me while she's supposed to be sleeping.

I spot her.

She ducks. Her eyes peek up over the windowpane and I signal her to lay down and go to sleep.

A few seconds later, I see Minnie Mouse's ears and eyes peek up over the window pane.


Minnie watches the rest of the time I'm mowing, until I walk over to the window and say, "Minnie, go to sleep."

Cheesy Tactics
The next morning, Belle says, "Can I have a cheesy omelet?"

"We're out of eggs," I say. "But you can have some of my breakfast."

"What are you eating?" Belle says.

"Oatmeal."

Belle says, "Would you like some cheesy omelet?"

Juggling Johnny
Later that day, we go grocery shopping. The next morning, Johnny decides to take up juggling. His first practice items? The new eggs from the fridge.

"No, Johnny!" I exclaim.

Belle consoles me. "Daddy, I still love you all the time. And we're going to be friends forever. Because we're not strangers."

We clean up the eggs. Now if I can only get Johnny to try on his new Winnie the Pooh costume. It's warm, fuzzy and cute.

But he's mortally afraid of it. When he sees it, he sticks his head under the coach.

Looks like this Halloween the trick will be on me.